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Reconciled

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Recently, I took a minute to ask myself if I was in need of reconciliation to any particular race? Recently, our church launched a center for racial reconciliation and I was contemplating attending. I am married to a Black man and we have two children. I was raised in a predominantly Hispanic neighborhood where I was the only Asian who took folkloric dance lessons for 7 years with my Hispanic…

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The Most Unlikely Interview

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  While sitting at lunch one day, my husband said, “go ahead, interview me”. It was almost as if he had read my mind as I wrestled to ask him if I could interview him for this blog. My husband had a very unique experience at the camp. It was one of those experiences that I didn’t think I wanted to write about, or so I thought. However, as my interview with…

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Where The Streets Have No Name

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  A popular music group U2 wrote a song in 1987 called “Where the Streets Have No Name”. It was said that their lead singer and writer, Bono, was inspired by something he heard about a city called Belfast. Belfast was described to him as a place where people knew what a person’s religion and financial situation was based on the street they lived on. This song made me think about the way…

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Perspective

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  I spent a good portion of my life trying to create the “perfect life”. I wanted the perfect wedding, the perfect home, the perfect husband and children. In my perspective, this was all inclusive of the house in a safe neighborhood, the husband who gets home from work in time for dinner, and the children who are involved in everything and get straight “A”’s. Little or no suffering. It was a circus act…

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What will be your legacy?

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  Most people think of a legacy as something material that is passed onto the next generation, but have you ever thought of leaving a model of a healthy marriage to your children as a legacy? Don’t we all want our children and grandchildren for generations to come to have strong and healthy marriages? For some of us we have to overcome the effect of bad marriages that were modeled to us in…

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Don’t Give Up

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  Recently, I attended my daughter’s violin recital at her school. At about week three of her lessons she decided she wanted to quit. She believed everyone in her class was able to play without squeaking except her. That’s when I had the idea to show her some YouTube videos of some instructors that said everyone squeaks in the beginning. I guess she was expecting to pick up the violin and play like the…

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Wherever You Go There You Are

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  I am not one typically to pick up on catchy sayings and adopt them as my truth, but this one has stuck with me. Many people tend to leave difficult situations and difficult relationships too quickly. By leaving, they usually miss the deep character training and lessons. Haven’t you ever left one check out line at the grocery store to go to another line that seemed shorter, only to find yourself waiting…

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Check Up

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  Is the trip to the dentist a pleasant one for you? If you brush and floss your teeth routinely, then the next trip will probably not be a painful one. Marital counseling can be like a routine trip to the dentist. Sooner or later you have to have someone evaluate the status of your current situation. It usually will determine if the work that needs to be done will be painful or just…

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Moving Forward After the Weekend

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    Six years ago I began working at our local church. There wasn’t anything conventional about how I got there. However, before I decided to take the job, I went through this process of counting the costs of working at a church. One thought that went through my mind was what I would find on the other side of “the curtain” as I started my employment at a place I had a…

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Hope for the Broken Hearted

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    Six months ago my husband and I attended Relationship Lifeline. After 22 years together, 14 years of marriage, a 20-year-old son, and a seven-year-old daughter, we finally hit a wall. We were in a drought of hope and pure exhaustion. We had been to counseling sessions, marriage retreats, and great marital classes. However, in our moment of truth, we were just plain tired. Like most couples, we got to a…

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